Posts Tagged body control

The day Ralph and I changed places.

June 8, 2000 — The day Ralph and I changed places
“I stood in the rain on White Oak Hill. In the heat I was
getting soaked, clothes and fur, but I didn’t move…”

Finished the first part of Ralph’s story and posted it to the library and FA.

[final] Atligili.

I looked at the costume in its box and tried to hold out against the temptation to wear it again. I didn’t want to wear it—it wanted me to wear it. It compelled me. But I didn’t want to wear it. I had only worn it three times since I’d gotten it, and each time….

The fear was exciting—addictive. I didn’t want it to be. I didn’t want to think about it.

I knew if I thought about it, it would get into my mind again.

And if it got into my mind, I would wear the costume again.

And if I wore the costume, the monster that it was would get hungry again.

And I was already running out of stuff.

But I couldn’t stop looking. The fear was exciting—addictive. It compelled me.

It was a gorgeous alligator suit, the kind that inflates around you and makes you look like a big shiny pool toy when you’re wearing it. Just then, though, I thought it looked kind of sad, stuffed in its box all rumpled like it was. I never did put it away properly… after the last time, when the thing’s hunger had faded and I was in control again, I hadn’t taken any chances: I’d hid it away as quickly as I could.

It was a shame to mistreat something so valuable. I figured I ought to at least fold it up properly.

When I picked it up, though, I knew I was trapped again.

It was the smell of it that grabbed me, that pure smell of vinyl, or whatever it was that it—that he was really made of… it entered my nose, bypassed my brain, and took hold somewhere deep in my gut.

Before I had realized what was happening I had already torn my clothes off—and I mean I literally ripped them from my body. I didn’t know I had that kind of strength in me. The smell was so powerful! He shouldn’t have smelled so clean—I’d left him covered in the remains of what he’d eaten—crumbs and spills of food and drink and worse… the paint, I couldn’t convince him paint wasn’t for drinking, and he’d gone through five cans and it had been so sour in my stomach—and the blood, I’d forgotten… how the cat had struggled… but he was clean now, somehow, and…

…and those memories were fading away again now, now that he was controlling me again. I climbed into him through the opening in his chest. I closed up the airtight seal and pulled up the oversized costume zipper that covered it. And I turned on the built-in pump under his tail that would give him his shape.

He never spoke, but I could feel his satisfaction: I was his dependable slave, even though I was unwilling. I felt his hunger, too. I watched his reflection in my bedroom mirror as the air filled him fat and round—so beautiful, so majestic, were the thoughts in my head; whether they were his or mine I wasn’t sure—and as soon as he was full he stretched out, hopped on his big feet experimentally, and barreled purposefully out the door.

My house, as I mentioned, was already mostly empty. The beast sniffed at the air and, though I didn’t smell anything, he must have gotten wind of something. He bounded into the kitchen, the wobble of his body pushing hard against my skin. The kitchen cupboards were still empty; I hadn’t dared to refill them since last time and I’d been eating out.

He grabbed the trash can.

Please, no, I pleaded.

He opened his jaws wide, forcing mine open as well, much wider than should have been comfortable for me. He poured in the contents of the trash can, and I tasted Styrofoam, greasy fast-food wrappers, and a few day-old French fries.

I felt like I was going to be sick as the monster forced me to chew and swallow. But he wouldn’t get sick, so neither would I, no matter how much I wished it.

The gator moved a big paw down over his belly. I knew what he was thinking: Still empty…

He sniffed around again, but I could tell nothing left in my house interested him. He barged out my door and stepped into the street, and I trembled inwardly at the beast’s thoughts… a very clear picture of the meat we would have today.

The day Ralph and I switched places.

Previous | First(ish)
Almost done with this story’s first draft, then I’ll get the full first draft posted. Also, I’ve decided I’ll be calling Ralph and Shine’s world Turia.

We worked out for a good half hour, till I was good and sweaty, even with the big fan going full blast.

I felt better. Endorphins’ll do that, Ralph thought.

And that’s why you’re always on the weights, eh?

He didn’t have to answer.

I got up, wiped down the equipment and took a good long shower in the guest bathroom, thinking of Ralph while the sweat rinsed from my fur.

1st draft [partim] – The day Ralph and I switched places.


Ralph didn’t intervene as I tried to recover. I was glad of it, too—I was embarrassed enough I needed to be alone. By the time I’d calmed down, wiped my face, and felt I could face the world again—or at least try—dinner had already ended.

Fair enough; maybe I could face the world, but I didn’t really feel like facing campus again today.

I missed Ralph. Stupid evening shifts.

I headed back to his place, and I was so distracted by my own thoughts about my future that I didn’t notice Ralph had taken over my body again till we were walking through the front door. He went to his weight room, sat me down on a bench, and we started pumping iron.

1st draft [partim] – The day Ralph and I switched places.

The previous section of this draft was posted a month ago.    This outcome is something I had not at all expected would happen, but it seems inevitable, really.   I know it ends pretty weak here; in draft it’ll be smoothed to segue better into whatever ends up happening next.

“You’re in my chemistry class, aren’t you?” he said, to the burly human in line in front of me.

Ralph’s smiles were infectious, even with my face cracking them. At least, they felt that way from the inside. The guy was not won over. “Yeah… so what?”

By the look he gave me, you’d think I was some new species of pond scum—uninteresting and distasteful.

“I just thought that—”

“I’m not interested in speaking to you,” the guy said, and turned back to face the front of the line.

Ralph turned to face the mouse girl in line behind him. “What was that about,” he said.

“Everyone knows you’re gay,” she said. “You do realize that limits your social circle, right?”

I didn’t know what people thought about me, so of course Ralph couldn’t have.

I’d like to say Ralph handled it gracefully, made a joke, and shrugged it off, but he didn’t get the chance—I took over, fled the cafeteria, and hid under some stairs in the music building, crying, for a good long time.

1st draft [partim] – The day Ralph and I switched places.

I’ve already got the beginning and the ending of this story written out; this week, like the past few times I’ve been working on it, I’ve been writing to link the beginning and the ending together.  Since this is a bit out of context, I should explain that Ralph’s mind is in Frank here; Ralph is mostly in charge of the body but Frank’s mind is still present, chiefly as an observer by this time of the day.

Usually I got my sleeping done while Ralph was at work. For the moment, though, I’d had enough sleep. You bet you have, Ralph said, and took over. “Time to be a better tiger.”

He put on my shoes and got in my car, heading for campus.

I wasn’t really sure what he had in mind, but I felt him running through my memories on the way back.

You don’t know how good you have it, he thought.


Heck, you even get free food out here…

It’s not free.

Well, it gets billed to your parents and they don’t complain. They won’t begrudge you your brain food! My dad won’t even buy me a hamburger.

He got in line at the cafeteria.

Now me, I don’t really know anybody at school. I keep to myself when I’m not with Ralph.

Ralph obviously wasn’t having any of that.